Yesterday I had a child come to me with deep concerns of feeling inadequate and lonely. It broke my heart to hear that this child felt friendless and that this child didn't think he/she was prepared for future obligations and opportunities.
But these feelings are also very real to me. I often get weighed down with feelings of despair as I sometimes feel alone in my quest to be the mother that I should be for my children. With all the children in school, I have found that it takes a focused, diligent effort to achieve a sense of purpose in my roles as a mother, wife, friend, sister, teacher....and the list continues. I find that I will do well for a while, and then the world seems to come crashing down beside me with extreme feelings of loneliness and inadequacies. I totally relate to this child.
So my question is: How do I provide support and strength when this is one of my own challenges?
Of course, I rattled off some quick answers and encouragement to the child, but they didn't seem to be the answer that we needed. (I find that we all can get easily discouraged when we focus on the big picture or challenge without breaking it down into small-bite size manageable chunks).
So with that, I prayed for direction in helping this child. And the answer came this morning as we were reading the Book of Mormon in 2nd Nephi 4:15-35, also known as the Psalm of Nephi.
Nephi shared his feelings of discouragement and despair even though he had seen angels, heard the voice of the Lord, and delighted in the scriptures.
"O wretched man that I am! Yea, my heart sorroweth because of my flesh; my soul grieveth because of mine iniquities. I am encompassed about, because of the temptations and the sins which do so easily beset me."
In the Gospel Doctrine Sunday School class, one man commented that his imperfections become more clearer to him as he studies the scriptures and applies them to his life. At first this sounded depressing to me. But now I realize from Nephi that this is something that I can rejoice in because it shows that I am drawing closer to Christ and realizing more and more the need for Christ and His atonement in my life as I submit my will to His.
In the remaining versus in 2nd Nephi 4, Nephi shows a progression from being weighed down with these shortcomings to relying completely upon the "Rock of our salvation " who is Christ the Lord.
v 20 " My God hath been my support"
v 21 "He hath filled me with his love"
v 22 "He hath confounded mine enemies"
v 23 "He hath heard my cry by day and he hath given me knowledge"
After giving proof that the Lord has continually been with him, Nephi asks "why should my heart weep and my soul linger in the valley of sorrow....why should I yield to sin, because of my flesh? ...why would I give way to temptations, that the evil one have place in my heart to destroy my peace and afflict my soul? Why am I angry because of mine enemy? (
Or in other words, why am I so human?)
What does Nephi teach me next on how to solve these feelings of discouragement? (This is the answer!)
"Awake, my soul! No longer droop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart and give place no more for the enemy of my soul. Do not anger again because of mine enemies. Do not slacken strength because of mine afflictions. Rejoice, O my heart, and cry unto the Lord and say: O Lord, I will praise thee forever; yea, my soul will rejoice in thee, my God, and the rock of my salvation. O Lord, wilt thou redeem my soul? Wilt thou deliver me out of the hands of mine enemies? Wilt thou make me that I may shake at the appearance of sin? May the gates of hell be shut continually before me, because my heart is broken and my spirit is contrite! O Lord, wilt thou encircle me around in the robe of thy righteousness! O Lord, wilt thou make a way for mine escape before mine enemies! Wilt thou make my path straight before me! Wilt thou not place a stumbling block in my way but that thou wouldst clear my way before me, and hedge not up my way, but the ways of mine enemy. O Lord, I have trusted in thee and I will trust in thee forever. I will not put my trust in the arm of flesh; for I know that cursed is he that putteth his trust in the arm of flesh. Yea, cursed is he that putteth his trust in man or maketh flesh his arm. Yea, I know that God will give liberally to him that asketh Yea, my God will give to me, if I ask not amiss; therefore I will lift up my voice unto thee; yea, I will cry unto thee, my God, the rock of my righteousness. Behold, my voice shall forever ascend up unto thee, my rock and mine everlasting God."
There was a great message in the Ensign titled, "
What Nephi Teaches About Overcoming Discouragement".
In this article the author lists things that we can learn from Nephi.
1- Keep a journal to write down feelings and thoughts.
2- Ponder about the things you read and learn from the scriptures.
3- Study the scriptures and delight in them.
4- Count the blessings the Lord has given you.
5- Discard negative feelings with positive ones.
6- Pray
7- Praise and trust in the Lord
8- Seek repentance from the Lord's atonement for you.
I am grateful for this answer to my prayer, one that will help me personally and one that will help a child. I know that we can be shown answers to our questions and challenges as we study the scriptures and make them a part of our life. I want to delight in them like Nephi, that is my goal.
Below is a video of a song performed by the BYU Men's Chorus during the April 2007 General Conference. The song titled, Nephi's Psalm, takes its words from 2 Nephi Chapter 4 and it's melody from the song, Be Still My Soul.
I hope that your spirits are lifted and you know that you are not alone.
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